What is your first thought when you meet someone in the same line of business as you? Is your immediate reaction to see them as a threat, someone eating into your market share? Or do you think, “That is interesting, I wonder how we can help one another?”

You can’t stop people joining your market, so why waste time and energy fighting against them. More often than not, if you examine their offering in greater detail, you will find that they are not directly in competition with you in any case, and therefore there may well be ways in which you can help each other to find business. I often meet people who say they are coaches/trainers or consultants, but I have hardly ever met someone who provides the same services as me.

As we all know most people buy on emotion rather than logic, and therefore one of the biggest parts of the emotional side of things which works towards your decision as to who you will buy from, is whether you like the person you are dealing with. Now much as I would like to think everyone will like me (and why not), realistically this simply is not going to be the case. So instead of just dropping a lead altogether, why not pass them on to someone else. In this way you can still help the lead you had, and your “competitor” at the same time. For those of you who have read “The Psychology of Persuasion” by Robert Cialdini (highly recommended), you will know that the power of the “reciprocity rule” is incredibly strong. In other words, if you give something to someone, they feel a huge desire (even obligation) to give something back, so by helping your supposed competitor, you should in turn be helping yourself.

So stop worrying about what “the competition” are or are not doing. Believe in yourself, be confident and aware of your own USPs, and learn to work with, not against people. Believe me, it is a lot less tiring and generally far more rewarding.

Reading about the couple who were kidnapped by pirates, and who have finally been released after a year in captivity, made me think of two things which are so important for anyone at almost any stage of their lives. The first being that it is so important to have goals and dreams, because that should be the driving force (the purpose) in your life, and secondly to never give up, or give in to despair.

I suppose I quite often write about the importance of setting goals, so I won’t dwell on this too much, but suffice to say that it became evident from all the news programmes and chat shows, that many people dream of selling up and retiring on a boat, or other such things, and clearly if you want it badly enough, these dreams are certainly within your grasp. So always believe that you can get where you want, even though at times it seems a distant fantasy.

This, of course, leads onto the other aspect of this blog, of never giving up. They must have been close to that point on many occasions, especially when they were split up, and couldn’t offer encouragement to each other. Business owners too, are often at their wits end, wondering how on earth they can ever achieve the goals they had when they started out so enthusiastically. Although it isn’t a life or death situation, sometimes when the debts are mounting up, and the sales are non-existent, and the family want a holiday, and everything seems to be working against you, it is easier to buckle under, and just feel sorry for yourself, rather than stand up and fight. Nearly always there is a way out, but you need to be positive and believe that you can win. No doubt all of us feel very alone at times, with no-one to turn to, but wallowing in our own misery will certainly not improve things. I find the poem “The Man Who Thinks He Can” by Walter Wintle, inspirational in times when I am down.
I hope you enjoy it.

The Man Who Thinks He Can
If you think you are beaten, you are;
If you think you dare not, you don’t.
If you’d like to win, but think you can’t,
It’s almost a cinch you won’t.
If you think you’ll lose, you’re lost,
For out in the world we find
Success begins with a fellows will;
It’s all in the state of mind.
If you think you’re outclassed, you are;
You’ve got to think high to rise.
You’ve got to be sure of yourself before
You can ever win a prize.
Life’s battles don’t always go
To the stronger or faster man;
But soon or late the man who wins
Is the one who thinks he can.

by Walter D. Wintle

Possibly one of the hardest things to learn as a business owner, is how to become a good leader. Leadership is by no means something which comes naturally to a lot of people, but mastering this is essential to running a successful efficient and profitable business.

I meet all sorts of different people in my role as a business coach, and consequently they vary considerably in how they run their teams. Because many of these businesses started as very small enterprises with maybe 2 or 3 employees, they tend to be treated as part of a family or group of friends, rather than a boss/employee relationship. This in turn creates a culture where decisions tend to be made by democratic vote, rather than a clear vision from the business owner leading the way.

I remember being told that a leader should often be seen more as someone who stands above directing people through a maze, whilst the management are on the ground ensuring the team carries out the orders which help them to go in the direction which the leader has determined.
So leadership is not necessarily doing practical things, but ensuring that the team have the resources and tools to allow them to carry out their roles efficiently. However, nor is leadership expecting your team to do things, or act in certain ways, but not do so yourself. I have often come across businesses where the owner or owners are insisting on timeliness and cleanliness, or not talking about others behind their backs, but not adhering to these rules themselves.

For me, one of the key aspects of leadership is consistency. Giving praise when praise is due, but equally well ensuring that people know when they have fallen below expected standards, and explaining the consequences of such failings. Mutual respect is essential for creating good boss/employee relations, and this is generally best achieved by being fair, honest and consistent.